so, i went to go interview the ninja i was supposed to interview, but it turns out he wasnt a ninja at all. he is a professional ultimate fighter, who trains guys that go over to japan and fight on pay-per-view.
and he wants me to come to his classes because I'd "have a great advantage with that monster reach. and if anybody went to come in close to you[me], you just get them in the face with one of those big knees".

im going back tomorrow evening to his fight club-esque ultimate fighting training session in the top floor of the field house at sheridan park. so, if you see me on pay-per-view getting kicked in the face, don't be alarmed